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Дагестанский форум www.live-dag.ru » общение » Юмор » Шутки и приколы
Шутки и приколы
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:01 | Сообщение # 46
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Если женщина не идет к Азеру, то Азер идет к мужчине.
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:02 | Сообщение # 47
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Согласно статистике, каждый пятый россиянин знает, что Дагестан - это территория России.
...А остальные четверо живут спокойно...
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:02 | Сообщение # 48
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Каждое утро азербайджанцы собираются на рынке и продают помидоры.
Затем появляются ОМОНовцы, разгоняют азербайджанцев и растаптывают помидоры.
Через час азербайджанцы снова собираются на рынке и продают КЕТЧУП.
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:02 | Сообщение # 49
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- Почему аварцы когда выкручивают лампочку на потолке, делают это впятером?
- Потому, что один стоит на табуретке, а остальные четверо вращают её...
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:02 | Сообщение # 50
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Самый короткий чеченский анекдот: «Русские ушли»
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:02 | Сообщение # 51
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Первый заместитель начальника генерального штаба Вооруженных сил России генерал-полковник Валерий Манилов сообщил:
- В результате спецоперации на территории Чеченской Республики захвачено крупное бандформирование сепаратистов. В следственном изоляторе "Лефортово", куда уже доставлены боевики, ведутся предварительные допросы таких известных сепаратистов, как:
Ушат Помоев, Улов Налимов, Букет Левкоев, Рекорд Надоев, Отряд Ковбоев, Подрыв Устоев, Подиум Прибоев, Погром Евреев, Поджог Сараев, Захват Покоев, Исход Изгоев, Побег Злодеев, Обвал Забоев, Угон Харлеев, Удел Плебеев, Камаз Отходов, Развод Супругов, Забег Дебилов, Парад Уродов. Личности других террористов в настоящий момент устанавливаются...
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:02 | Сообщение # 52
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Высоко в горах стояло баскетбольное кольцо. Один гордый джигит решил забросить в него мяч сверху. Разбежался, прыгнул высоко высоко, прямо к солнцу, и обгорел себя. Так появились негры и баскетбол.
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:02 | Сообщение # 53
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Знаешь, почему аварцы в маршрутке в перёд садятся?
- Чтобы быстрее доехать!
- А знаешь, почему лакцы назад садятся?
- Тиши едешь, дальше будешь.
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:02 | Сообщение # 54
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- Что нужно сделать, чтобы у даргинца загорелись глаза?
- Посветить ему фонариком в ухо.
- Что нужно сделать, чтоб аварец смеялся в понедельник утром?
- Рассказть ему анекдот в субботу вечером.
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:03 | Сообщение # 55
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- Алло, Лена! Приве-е-ет! Я из Махачкалы, прикинь! Ты не представляешь, какой это ужасный город! Везде пристают: то норовят в машину затащить, то к поручням прижмут... В общем, так отдохнула, так отдохнула!!!
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:03 | Сообщение # 56
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- Почему аварцы пьют молоко, кефир и т.д. в магазине?
- Потому что на молоке, на кефире и т.д. написано «Открывать здесь»
 
WantedДата: Суббота, 30.04.2011, 20:03 | Сообщение # 57
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- Почему у аварцев носки все время дырявые в области пальцев?
- Потому что ногти через носки стригут.
 
AkraborBoxДата: Суббота, 09.06.2018, 11:41 | Сообщение # 58
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